Tonesa Welch shared some advice over the weekend for women who have been incarcerated: Be determined, don’t give up, and find the people who are willing to help. 

Welch was sentenced to five years in prison for money laundering and was released in 2012. The 2023 film “First Lady of BMF: The Tonesa Welch Story” chronicles her life as a member of the Black Mafia Family (BMF), a drug trafficking and money laundering organization that started in Detroit in the 1980s. 

Welch now works with formerly incarcerated women and advocates for state and federal policy changes to reduce recidivism and create more opportunities for women to reintegrate into their communities after incarceration. 

On Saturday, Welch spoke at the Cleveland Public Library downtown, sharing her story with about 50 women at a pre-Mother’s Day brunch event. 

She told the women to find people willing to give them a second chance and to find resources they need, especially for mental health. 

Places like LMM (Lutheran Metropolitan Ministry), the Cuyahoga County Office of Reentry, second-chance employers and church support groups help people reintegrate into society after incarceration.

“I want you to understand that it’s gonna be a hard journey,” Welch said. “But you just gotta keep moving. You just gotta keep pushing and never give up because somebody else is going to help you.”

Determined to change

Welch said she took the long route to becoming successful. There weren’t many second-chance employers or prison programs when she was doing time, she said.

Today, there are more programs in and out of prison to help people wanting to turn their lives around as they reintegrate. 

People like herself, or like Malika Kidd, LMM’s Workforce Development Program director, are willing to help women get back on their feet. Kidd, who sat in the audience, was incarcerated for 14 years and has since earned a bachelor’s and a master’s degree while working in leadership roles at LMM. 

“I’m here to show you that you don’t have to go the long way,” Welch said. “I did all the work for you. All you need to do is find people like me and I will give you the easy route to how to get there and how to do it.”

But even the “easy route” comes with challenges.

More than a thousand state and federal laws limit or prevent people convicted of crimes from accessing certain rights, benefits and opportunities. They’re called collateral sanctions or collateral consequences, and they can keep formerly incarcerated people from working certain jobs, getting approved for housing, volunteering or getting an education. 

That’s where Welch’s determination came in. She struggled to find a job – and she didn’t give up. 

“Being in prison you hear ‘no’ all the time. ‘No, no, no, you can’t do this. You can’t have that’,” Welch said. “So hearing ‘no’ on the streets is nothing for me. I was determined to show my family that I could change. I was determined to show my community I can change.”

‘There’s something that’s holding me back’

Anngela Williams teared up as she asked Welch for advice on how to overcome the stigma of incarceration. 

“I’ve done great things since I’ve been home,” Williams said. “But there’s something that’s holding me back from reaching my highest potential because I have this record.”

Williams told Signal Cleveland that while she has accomplished a lot since coming home from prison, she’s still searching for a higher purpose. At the microphone, facing Welch, she said she went to prison twice and has several felonies on her record. 

“I’ve been through therapy, but it’s just something in me that holds me back as far as how I feel about myself,” Williams said, choking up. “And I know what’s in me, but I won’t let it go.”

As she sat down, another woman approached Williams and handed her a napkin. Williams dabbed tears from her cheeks as she listened to Welch’s response. 

Welch told her to stick with therapy, even if it sometimes doesn’t seem to be helping. She also told her to speak kindly to herself and give herself grace. 

“I feel connected,” Williams said. “I feel a sense of support.” 

She said the biggest lesson she’s learned from her experiences is that it’s easy to do the wrong thing. Changing her life has required her to “dig deep within yourself,” Williams said. 

“That was the path that I always chose, whatever was easy, or I can figure out how to get easy I would do,” she said. “But life is a challenge.”